Tuesday, January 1, 2013

Pong Tahu Mee (Save the Ocean Crustaceans)

Pong Tahu Mee 1

One of the highlights of the many delicious meals you can order at Vegetarian Era @ Eunos must surely be the Pong Tahu Mee.. We have already posted on this location at the convenient Eunos MRT station, just behind the bus stop opposite Vegan Burg.

Pong Tahu Mee 2


Pong Tahu Mee has its roots when people used to eat seafood and kill crustaceans wherever they can be caught in rivers and oceans. This particular dish is the veganized version of the noodle developed for local taste buds. The traditional ingredients are the yellow noodle, kang kong vegetable, crunchy vegetarian bits and of course the ocean crustacean beings are replaced by the tofu pellets with vegetarian filling. The soup is deliciously tasty with its unique authentic flavour garnished with faux onion shavings.

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Warning: Graphic description of the armageddon follows. If you are leaning on an excuse of sleeping on carnivoric ignorance based on mass media mind-controlled negative programming, then do not read further. Parental guidance is advised.

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The decapod crustaceans beings of the infraorder Brachyura are often crucified and immobilized through the use of nylon or rope fabric because of the particular fear of the powerful defensive action of the pincers when attacked by the butcheries of "humane" fisher-men. Death for the Brachyura comes almost instantaneously through the guillotine bisection effect of disembodiment usually executed via a ventral assault with a blunt tool such as a sharpened cleaver. The Chinese butcheries are also notorious for using a single chopstick in a direct jabbing action to the myocardial region or thoracic cavity thereabouts. This particularly heinous and beastly assault usually resulted in a painful, slow death.

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From the moment the crustacean beings were caught from the rivers or oceans, their fate is sealed as they are quickly crucified and kept in steel cages preventing any form of escape. During the long arduous journey of transportation and shipment and the eternal wait for the ransom of their lives which cost a pittance, they endured long periods of claustrophobic confinement and debilitation. Circulatory irregularities such as dizziness, hyperthermia, dehydration and atrial fibrillation are common amongst many other disorders.

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The gastronomic preparation of the carnivore diet does not respect the sex of the Ocean Crustacean beings. If the species happened to be an impregnated female, then the guillotine insection procedure along the sagittal plane of the crucified Crustacean being lying in the supine position more often then not, dichotomizes the ovarian cavity resulting in the swift effusion of yellow spawn, which is apparently highly prized and whetted by the voyeuristic, carnal and canivoral appetite of the H. sapiens.

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Needless to say the many injuries sustained by the ocean beings include hernia, massive internal hemorrhage and systemic shock. Upon execution of the guillotine, the beings also suffered from exoskeleton fracture resulting in permanent and irreversible structural collapse of the anatomy. Frequently the cause of death of the ocean beings can be attributed to "evisceration, and massive, multiple systemic failure".

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In the case of the Chinese malevolent butcheric preparation, death can also be caused by "myocardial infarction due to repeated morbid incisions using an extraneous tapered but elongated object of coppice or planktonic origin, resulting in immediate rupture of thoracic cavity leading to multiple failure of internal organs and secondary trauma caused by systemic shock and convulsive epileptic seizures moments before imminent mortality". Such preparation then leads to further post mortem 4th degree burns and inflammation of the cordovan cadaver which together with some spicy sauces added to mask the offensively malodorous stench of organic decay, presents itself in ceramic ware to appease the mighty and insatiable appetite of the carnivore who raises about $12 for the bloody slaughter. Such preparations are routinely carried out in carnivorous restaurant kitchens all over the world by affectless employees with robotic albeit clinically apethetic efficiency.

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The fate of the Dendrobranchiata crustacean beings are not any more merciful than the Brachyura cousins. They are routinely decapitated and deshelled with impassive invertebrate disdain after their death from asphyxia. Chinese butcheric practice also often dictate the instantaneous removal of fecal excrement through post mortem colectomy and rectal resection using bare hands and fingers. The black thread of feces is deftly removed from the dorsal antero-posterior axis as they are considered too "bitter" to taste in carnivorous gastronomic preparations.

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We will spare you the grisly details of the other medieval, carnivoristic practice of alcoholic imbibition of the Dendrobranchiata in vivo, which is the most barbaric, diabolical, right in your face slap of misanthropically dehumanizing procedure ever invented by the Chinese butcheries, but you can imagine for yourself the process involve utmost cruelty and the unspeakable denial of universal suffrage on the rights of the persecuted Crustacean beings.

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Now you know the real meaning of the word "seafood" and the power behind hypnotic mass media bombardment of daily doses of mind-controlled advertisements. In the eyes of the Carnivora, the whole "sea", and every single living thing that ever moves in it, irrespective of size, is "game" for "food". What kind of voracious, egocentric, eat-until-nothing-is-left appetite, borne of a necro-sacrilegious and agnostic world view, can one find in such a philosophy of paramount imbecilic arrogance that is espoused in that one word alone ! Now you understand why the eschatology of the Ocean Crustacean Beings prognosticate the eschatology of man"un-kind".

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Pong Tahu Mee - Vegan World

So we are done with the grotesquely distasteful description of the carnivorous, holographic "un-real" world. We are now back to the safety of the vegan world.

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Pong Tahu Mee - Vegan World

This vegan dish comes in two version, dry or soup. The dry version has a small bowl of soup to compliment the noodle. For the foodist, no dish is considered complete if the soup is not up to the standard expectation. The highlight of Pong Tahu Mee, therefore is in the soup preparation. The taste is sweet and excellent. The stock is rich and delicious. The cook has put much thought into the details. As you savour the soup remember to look for the faux onion rings. Highly realistic texture that reminds us of the tasty fried onion rings used to garnish this dish. There is of course no onion or garlic used. This fact should make it attractive a lot of Buddhists clients, who by tradition, prefer meals without the onion and garlic flavours.

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Pong Tahu Mee - Vegan World

Another way to eat is to order the Pong Tahu Soup itself. With an extra bowl of rice, there is more soup to dig in and to fulfill the vegan's appetite. Price of each dish range from $2.50 to $3.50 and it is certainly cheap and affordable.

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Pong Tahu Mee - Vegan World

With the company of some friends, it is a great eat-out location for a warm meal and nice conversation. We have been there many times and tried out the various dishes which perhaps we will blog in another post.

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Pong Tahu Mee - Vegan World

So the next time you alight at Eunos MRT, head over to the vegan stall and order the Pong Tahu Mee.. and you can help save the Ocean crustacean beings' lives.. and it is a halal meal too !


Stanley Sng said...

Thanks for Sharing.
I think I will have to try this Pong Tahu Mee myself.

Lasm said...

Yes, do try the H5PO soup and the other claypot dishes are interesting as well !

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